We have all come across the couple selfies that pop up on our Newsfeed all the time. Taken with various poses and filters, it almost feels like the couples are trying to bring up a continuous testament of their love.
On the receiving end, many of us actually cringe at the onslaught of relationship selfies or ‘relfies’. Couples who don’t click too many relfies feel like something is wrong with their relationship since reflies look picture perfect.
Singles desire that perfect life and go into a gloomy mode.
But are the couples in relfies really happy? Relationship experts come out with some astonishing news!
While we might only be seeing a couple from their Facebook posts, and never really understanding what might be going behind the scenes, it is the relationship experts who actually know whether a couple is happy or not. As a result, they could really crack open this mystery of picture-perfect couples.
Dr. Nikki Goldstein, a relationship expert and a sexologist has come with some astonishing news – couples who spend most of their time clicking selfies are actually one of the saddest couples.
Why do they look picture perfect then? That’s the beauty of the virtual world. The couples are actually trying their best to look perfect to gain as much likes and comments as they can.
According to Goldstein, they are so unsure about their relationship that their only way to fortify their relationship is by seeking validation from others so that they believe that they are happy. By getting the required validation, these couples escape the struggles of their relationship. So, they are actually not as happy as they seem.
Dr. Nikki Goldstein told the Daily Mail how her job allows her to both look at posts made by couples as well as listen to their inside stories. The validation part was kind of shocking but it is not really that surprising.
There are many people who click pictures and post them just to get a bit of validation from their friends and family. However, Dr. Goldstein revealed something more shocking – the couples who click relfies most of the times are actually damaging their already struggling relationship. When they waste their time while clicking some selfies and use their creativity to create some sad posts, they could just look up from their phones and enjoy a together-moment.
After all, selfies are made to capture moments. Some of these couples, according to relationship experts, are just so addicted to selfie clicking that they would click their selfies and immediately start working on their phones without looking up, trying to find out the likes and comments. They miss out on special moments.
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So, what you tend to see in the photos is not their real-selves. Whenever they look up from their phone after an ample dose of validation, they are smacked by the reality about their struggling relationship.
Dr. Goldstein mentions how it is not wrong to post selfies. It’s perfectly all right, unless you are getting addicted to it. Whenever you get addicted to clicking selfies, it is at that moment that you start missing out on some real-life events.
Goldstein mentions an important piece of advice – keep the post entertaining and fun. Do not try to get some validation out of it. Nobody wants to see how perfect your relationship is on screen or how perfectly you have settled yourself with your partner.
However, it is always more necessary to understand how your relationship is in real life – for us and for you too. While it looks perfect on screen, is it really the same when you look up? It’s a good question to ask.
Limiting oneself is the key. A relationship is something to be experienced by those individual people involved with one another – it is not a performance to be displayed to an audience.
Let’s NOT focus on how we look through someone else’s eyes. Let’s look in the mirror and question ourselves: is this relationship really as great as we thought it is? If not, let’s work on it to make it better.
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