In everyone’s life there comes a point when they realize it cannot get more perfect than this. How do you know if the woman you are with is the absolute one? There are some sure signs to help you decide if you want to spend the rest of your life with the woman you have by your side.
Love and relationships have been studied and researched upon for years. What brings and keeps two people together to create a lasting healthy relationship is nearly impossible to predict. However, this is the closest studies have come to chalking down behavior you’ll most likely find in ‘the one.’
1. She is as smart as you, maybe even more
Ideally your partner should be smarter than you. Lawrence Whalley, professor emeritus of the University of Aberdeen, in his long time dementia research found that a smart woman can protect you from dementia later in life. While this sounds absurd at first, the basic idea is a smart woman will always challenge you intellectually. The constant exercise of your mental faculties will help you remain steady.
2. Absolute honesty
While everyone makes bad decisions and mistakes, dishonesty is a terrible destroyer of relationships. If your woman is not afraid to tell you the truth and doesn’t shy away from difficult conversation then she is definitely a keeper.
3. She sees the brighter side of things
Does your girlfriend always find the silver lining? Is her optimism almost innocently naive? If she is the kind of person who isn’t afraid to believe, dream and be encouraging, then she is the woman of your dreams. In the longer road, negative people are really not the best for our health and spirits. Their pessimism tends to rub on us, according to psychologist Elaine Hatfield. And negativity is not just bad for our mental state but also affects our bodies.
4. She compromises
Two people cannot always agree. If your girlfriend settles for a middle-road or a compromise instead of always insisting on her own argument, it means she is willing to take her load of the relationship. Psychologists of the UCLA after studying 172 couples for 11 years concluded that any couple can be happy during the good times, but you know a relationship is really good when things get tough and you are still willing to compromise for it.
5. She thinks you are funny
In a 2006 study by psychologists of Westfield State University suggested that it is more important for men to believe their partner finds them funny than for women. So if she thinks you are ridiculous, don’t let her go.
6. She is open and loveable
If your partner is the life of the party and stands out in a crowd, you are lucky. People who are open-hearted and not secretive are more attractive. A study by the University of Westminster suggests that this quality is so important that often people who are open hearted are judged to be a lot more appealing for it.
7. She has her own ambitions
For the longest time, successful women have been warned that men would not find them eligible for marriage. Christine C Whelan debunks this myth through her statistical analysis. In her book ‘Why smart men marry smart women” she explains how women who are successful have good marriages as well.
Smart men do not go for weaker women, very simply because a strong woman will not depend on you for her goals and ambitions. She will live her own life, and encourage you in your endeavors, and this balance is what makes marriages successful.
8. She has a good relationship with her parents
A quick check into what your partner will be like in 30 years is perhaps just taking a look at their parents. Researchers of the University of Alberta questioned 2970 people of all ages and saw a clear correlation between the relationship to the parents in their teen years and their love life later on.
9. She is a kind person
Who doesn’t love people who are kind, generous and considerate? If you don’t believe it, psychologist John Gottmann of the University of Washington started his research on married couples over four decades ago. He identified two kinds of couples: Masters and Disasters. The disasters, you guessed it, break it off in the first six years of the relationship. But the masters stay together for a long time and always have this one thing in common: “They are scanning social environment for things they can appreciate and say thank you for. They are building this culture of respect and appreciation very purposefully“.
10. She is not hot-headed
Every relationship has its fair share of fights. Never disagreeing is actually pretty unhealthy for a relationship. The important thing is how one deals with the fights. If your woman keeps her cool in a fight, she can then calm you down. This allows for civilized, considered disagreements.
11. She is not afraid to have fun
Kira Birditt, author of an University of Michigan study with 4864 couples concluded that couples who participate in more leisurely activities together are less likely to be unhappy with each other. If she likes staying out late or driving off on wild rides with you then it is meant to be.
12. She is her own person
In an interview, Terry Orbuch, the author of a University of Michigan study concluded that having one’s own set of friends, hobbies and plans is more important in a relationship than sex. If the couple has an identifiable life outside their relationship, it reduces dependency and keeps couples together longer.
13. She is okay with your flaws
“An optimistic approach will rub off on you and attract you to others who are seeing the world as half full” psychologist Terry Orbuch mentions. If she doesn’t constantly criticize your faults, keep her close.
14. She doesn’t bear a grudge
You are going to spend your lifetime with someone. If she doesn’t know how to let go of fights, to forgive and move on, it will be hard to stay together. So if your girl forgives and forgets, that means she is ready to be there for you, through the good and the bad.
If you think your woman has these qualities, then she is definitely the one!
Must Read The Best Books about Love and Relationship:
- The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts
- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert
- Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex