There are a lot of people who have a lot to give in their relationship with other people. Often, it turns into a disadvantage.
Being pure at heart does not ensure happiness for you if you are being violent to your own self. Some people let others walk all over them for the love of friendship or relationship but that is nothing more than a disgraceful act.
And when you do get depressed by finally being pulled down by other people’s shit, you tend to seek validation. At times, you may want so many people to like you that you forget what you are worth. Even as a kid, your parents must have tried to groom you into a saint so you are liked at your best potential by the society.
Our wings are cut off before we even open them to fly. Parents love us but they make the mistake of inculcating the idea of perfection and reaching up to everyone’s expectations in us from a young age. This is wrong of them as, in reality, people who strive for both of these things tend to get confused and get upset when they are unable to make everyone happy.
Nice people don’t get much out of all the sacrifices they make for others. Their favors are often forgotten and they are walked over. And when you do realize this, when you walk out of the fantasy you have been living in for so long, you have no place to go.
It is hard to start as a new person all over again. The ray of hope would be too far from you by then. Some signs would be calling a liar out, you picking your own fights, or telling people your opinion of them. You may end up feeling guilty.
Now, you must think about why do you care so much in the first place. If you forget to do your upper lips or wax your body hair, it is not a bad thing. It is wrong for people to call you out on it. Or if you wear a shade and people tell you it doesn’t look good on you, you stop wearing it, even though you liked it. If you thought you could pull it off, no one else should be telling you that you didn’t or couldn’t.
You must keep yourself number one priority in your own life for your mental health. You are your own best friend – go out to places that make you happy, don’t wait for anyone to take you there.
The more you provide others with emotional support, the more you will feel like you never get back. If you are after someone desperately, they will move further away from you and if you are always available for someone, they will start ditching you and take you for granted. It sounds unfair but it is a tried and trusted pattern of human behavior.
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The instant you begin to change into somebody who cares for their own self’s right, the others will extremely dislike it. They will not be okay with it, because it means you will not be emotionally dependent on them any longer. You do not have to be apologetic for it. They might even say that your character is threatening them. All you have to do is be confident.
If you notice any work place politics, all you have to do is complain against it. Don’t be afraid of losing your job or being out-casted because of it. Stand for yourself.
If you are in a relationship and you notice you are undergoing bad treatment at the hands of your partner, let them go. Don’t suffer through everything in the name of love. Love is not supposed to hurt.
You must invest heavily in yourself only. This way, you will get to know yourself and your needs clearly so you can convey them to others too. By this, others will know your worth and value and will treat you more respectably. Therefore, you must stand for yourself because no one else will, in order to protect your principles and beliefs and prevent anyone from telling you otherwise.