Relationship
An Open Letter To The Woman Who Always Ends Up As A Second Option
Life often hits us with disappointments that take us forever to get over and sometimes we get comfortable in this feeling of being broken. This happens because we have been treated so badly by other people, that we slip into a kind of consciousness where we think that this is what we deserve and this is what life is.
If you started reading this article after seeing the title, the assumption that your life is not going the way you would like it right now would be a fair one.
I know that you have been trying to do your best and you probably are, but somehow no one really sees it and appreciates it. People around you just seem to ask you for things and they act like you owe it to them to go out of your way to help them. This might apply to your love life as well, in which people just make you feel like they would only consider being with you if they did not have anyone else.
Things just never seem to go your way, while you spend all your time and devote yourself to people who treat you like an empty bottle of milk.
I know all of this hurts and reading all this so directly may make you feel like you deserve this; I am here to tell you that you absolutely do not!
When these things happen to us, we start to think that we are not good enough and that we were meant to suffer. That, however, is not true even a little. What you need is to love yourself and give yourself a try, a chance. You are so much better than you think you are. The fact that you are alive at this very moment is proof that the world needs you to exist. Even the best actor in the world could not play you the way you do.
Think about what a beautiful, incredible person you are, to be giving so much to people who do not even deserve it and never asking them anything in return. This kind of kindness is rare, rarer than the rarest of diamonds.
All I ask of you is to shower some of that kindness on to yourself, because you deserve it. You deserve to be treated like you matter, like you make a difference, because you do.
I know that saying all of this is easy but the ideal path of self-love is incredibly difficult to follow, given all the complexes and insecurities that we grow up with but it definitely is not impossible. You might have treated yourself badly for all these years but that does not mean you cannot take control of your life and change this pattern.
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When you do this to yourself, people around you start to think that this is the usual when it comes to treating you, and they think it is alright to just take advantage of all the magnificence that you radiate. Do not let them do it – they do not deserve the magic that you are.
Allow yourself to get angry and find time for your conveniences. I know you find it hard to say ‘no’ to people but it is time you said ‘yes’ to yourself and everything wonderful you need in your life to be happy. People who have left you in the past, left because they were bad people – it was not your fault. You do not have to reduce yourself to nothing to keep people in your life because the ones that are meant to stay, always will.
Life is a shit pile, no argument there, but it will not be a shit pile forever. Find yourself and love that person you find. Self-love is not selfish, it is necessary and beautiful. You are not an option; do not give anyone the power to make you one. You are a goddamn winner and it is time you started treating yourself like one. Let go of all the things and people that do not treat you right.
Give yourself the time to grow, and fall in love. With yourself and only yourself!