We all know what narcissism is. To love oneself to the extent that it stops being cute and important, and becomes gross and unnecessary. That is what narcissism is all about. You are so self-centered, that nothing matters to you beyond the length of your nose. That does affect the people around you, for no one likes a show off, who is so hell bent on proving to the entire world that people should fall on his feet and worship him. That irks everyone around.
But, there are things you would never see a narcissist do. Just like the Greek Narcissus, who was turned into a flower, for he kept seeing his reflection time and again, even you as a narcissist have you vices, that you would do well to let it go.
Here are some things that a narcissist should do, yet they don’t.
They just don’t transform, for better or worse. They are set in stone, and that simply harms themselves being so self-centered, without caring to change for the better, and well, not be so self centered, and try to think and care about people too; of course, people who aren’t themselves.
2. Letting Go
A narcissist doesn’t care much for leaving a relationship until he finds a worthy replacement for it. It doesn’t matter to them that this person has started accepting him as their own, and loves him with all their heart. For the narcissist, what matters is that they are receiving validation on a daily basis, and the moment they feel that someone else is giving more, they would leave the previous one in a heartbeat.
3. Peaceful Situations
A narcissist would never enable a peaceful surrounding. Everything is about him, his career, his looks, his hobbies, his life and being a sane human being, no one would want to bear with that all the time. Whenever someone brings that up to them, the narcissist human would raise a hue and a cry, and peace would be destroyed.
One Republic wrote the song because they knew that it was always “too late to apologize”. A narcissist would be their ideal muse for this song, for they would NEVER apologize. They would hold on to their end of the rod stubbornly, never letting go, even if they are so obviously in the wrong. It is because of the notion, that they can never be wrong.
5. Being Truthful
A narcissist is never truthful. It is because the truth would make them human, and they consider themselves to be someone more evolved. They would twist the truth to suit their needs, and that would always come out as a farce, that has no connections to the truth. They also never speak the truth, because it might put them in a position where people wouldn’t validate their existence, and hence, end up like others.
6. Extremely Competitive
Narcissists are fiercely competitive, with well…everything. They don’t like anyone who could be better than them, because that would mean they are inferior, which they would never accept, even at gunpoint. This makes them rival everyone and everything, usually on their looks, competing and staring down their noses at someone who doesn’t come up to them. Rachel McAdams from Mean Girls? That.
Narcissists aren’t empathetic, or capable of displaying empathy. Empathy is a moral value that comes from wanting to share in the misery of others, without any ulterior motive of one’s own. A narcissist couldn’t care less what happened to others, in fact they would be happier if someone suffered; it would put them in a good light. What needs to be realized is that, to a narcissist, normal humans are ants, not worthy of their time.
8. Treating Their Relationship Seriously
One’s relationship is similar to their work, it needs to be taken seriously. To a narcissist though, it resembles a game, one they can easily trade for, when it is all said and done. And not the kind of game you see when the New York Patriots go against the Boston Celtics. This is a miniature card game at a bar, where the stakes aren’t high. They would trade one woman/man for another, only if enabled them to get validation, and someone who would nurture them like their mother.
9. Accepting That They Feel
A narcissist would mention it twice an hour that they “don’t care”. In reality, they do. Every human does. What is stupid is someone thinking that a narcissist doesn’t care. Everything a person does, or says in respect to them hits them in the heart, however much they might try to deny it. They have a facade on, and it doesn’t take a genius to notice that.
10. Leaving The Spotlight
A narcissist lives for the spotlight. The term is “attention whore”. They are at their best before the camera, before people, where only they are being spoken about, and are kind of a nuisance in other scenarios.