The human mind is a fascinatingly complex thing. Every person has a unique pattern of behavior and response to any situation. But when they say that the mind over matter is what you should be aiming for, they’re right. These mental processes as complex as they seem at first glance are set off by simple events.
Your ability to perceive these smaller ‘happenings’ will give you a better understanding of these behaviors and allow you to control and respond to them effectively. Think of what we’re saying as a list of life hacks. By using these tips, you can figure out how to maneuver your way through the constant psychological minefield that constitutes every day social interactions.
These are very powerful tools. They can help you deal with your own problems in life and help you associate with the people around you.
1. The Value of Silence
If you ask someone a question and get an impartial or unsatisfactory answer, you should harness the power of silence. Remain silent after their answer and maintain steady eye contact. People have a natural tendency to explain further if you communicate through your silence alone. The person answering will naturally believe he/she needs to explain further.
2. Chew Gum
Seriously, do not underestimate the power of chewing gum. If you ever find yourself in a stressful situation just take out that wad of chewing gum and start chewing. It will trick your brain into thinking that you’re eating (which for the brain is always good news). It will automatically help you combat anxiety.
3. Watch while Laughing
Here’s a trick to figure out a group’s dynamic quickly. When a group of people are together and laughing at something, watch out for who are looking at each other during the laughter. People in moments of laughter will instinctively look towards the person they feel closest to.
4. Don’t State the Obvious
When stating an opinion or your point of view. don’t say phrases like ‘I believe’. People will find you more confident and convincing when you don’t state the obvious. You obviously believe what you’re saying. That’s why you’re saying it, right?
5. Stay Calm
In the face of someone else’s aggression and tantrums, don’t lose your cool. That doesn’t mean you don’t defend yourself. But stop yourself from getting angry and returning the tantrum favor. This will train the other person to stay calm. Or look at it this way; it’ll annoy the hell out of them seeing that they can’t rattle you.
6. Act the way you want to Feel
Outward actions are expressions of inner emotions. The way you feel inside will show itself on the outside. This is a two way street though. You can behave the way you want to feel and your mind will start experiencing that emotion. Want to be happy? Try smiling a lot.
7. Confidence is Key
Here’s a secret. Most people don’t know much about anything. As long as you appear confident and know what you’re doing, people will listen to you and give you their attention. Don’t believe us? Try it yourself!
8. Treat the Interviewer like an Interested Person
The more you get nervous and pretend that you’re in a slaughterhouse during the interview, the more you put the person interviewing you in misery. Talk naturally, with respect but in a relaxed and friendly manner. Imagine him to be an older favorite relative. The effect is instant.
9. Be the Change
If you want others to be in happy mood; you should be happy when you see them. It’s infectious. People will respond to your mood and it sets a pattern. They’ll be excited to see you next time. Look at dogs and you know it works.
10. To avoid a scolding sit closer to the person
If you want to avoid getting a dressing down from your boss at the meeting sit next to him. That’ll make him lose his pack mentality. People are uncomfortable attacking those close to them.
In customer service install a mirror behind you. People are less likely to be a**holes if they can see how they look like in the moment.
12. “Door-In-The-Face Technique”
Ask for a big favor first, one which is likely to get refused. Ask for what you want after that, and ensure that what you really want is less than what your initial request was. People will automatically grant the ‘small’ favor. Salesmen do this all the time.
13. Get Pumped
Being exhilarated and stressed have the same behavioral signs. So when you get stressed, try and think of your problem as a challenge and see how your body takes the physical signs of stress and makes them into excitement.
14. Make Others associate you with Fun
On a first date, do something especially fun. This way your partner will associate you with the experience of fun and excitement.
15. Eye Contact
Eye contact is everything. Maintain eye contact and people will naturally start getting closer to you.
Start a Better Life Right Now by Reading:
- You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life
- Girl, Wash Your Face: Stop Believing the Lies About Who You Are so You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be
- The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change