Off The Record

When My Kids Turned Against Me And My Husband Cheated On Me, I Had To Make An Impossible Choice

Published on October 16, 2024

I’ve sacrificed everything for my family, yet my spouse is unfaithful, and the children support him. I unexpectedly stumbled across my first love as I went outside to catch my breath during one of his gatherings. Then an offer arrived that left me speechless.

As I stood at the stove, stirring the soup, I felt distant but watched it bubble. Like every evening, the house was silent. Jack then entered through the front door.

No “Hello,” no, “How are you today?” My spouse didn’t even look in my direction. He threw his jacket on a chair and started discussing his job.

Without missing a beat, he stated, “Next week is another event.” “You’re on your way.”

I whispered quietly, “I don’t want to go,” knowing that my words would be inconsequential.

As usual, Jack ignored my response and continued chatting. His life revolved around his career, the people he could influence, and his reputation.

I was just another piece of equipment he was supposed to bring.

Soon later, we sat down to eat. Our 17-year-old son, Lucas, was already engrossed in his phone. He briefly raised his head to meet my gaze before returning to his texting.

I tried to attract his attention by saying, “You know, you could help set the table.”

Without raising his gaze, he mumbled, “Yeah, maybe later.”

Jack gave Lucas a quick smile but remained silent. Giving Lucas whatever he wanted, he had always been the easy dad. Money, a car, and no rules.

Lucas thought Jack was cool, and I was simply his annoying mother forcing him to study and eat his veggies.

Our 14-year-old daughter, Mia, was sitting across from me, head down, texting like her brother. We hardly spoke any more. She looked up to Jack, just like Lucas did. He didn’t question her friends, didn’t tell her no, and let her attend parties.

Mia abruptly said, “After dinner, I’m heading to Katie’s.”

“No, you can’t, Mia.” I started, but Jack nodded quickly, interrupting me.

Without even glancing at me, he answered, “Yeah, it’s okay.”

“Jack, we must discuss…” I gave it another go.

“Not right now,” he dismissed me. “We’ll take care of it later.”

It was always that way. The only person left to say no and worry about things was me. Jack, however, didn’t appear to be aware of the tension around the table.

He looked at me and then checked his watch.

When he said, “Be ready by six,” “Tonight, we’re attending the party. And grin, please. Making a good impression on my partners is important to me.”

I felt insignificant when I gazed at my plate. Someone unfamiliar in my own house. At my own table, a ghost. Furthermore, nobody seems to notice.

As usual, the celebration was extravagant, boisterous, and draining. While Jack amused his business associates, shaking hands and cracking jokes, I stood aside and forgot I was there. His world was that. I was merely a part of the landscape.

I tried to blend in with the wallpaper while I watched. Then I caught sight of her. Claire. Once more. She was too near to Jack and always present.

Her smile remained a fraction of a second too long, and I saw how she leaned in when she spoke. This was no accident. I had witnessed it far too often. My stomach rumble.

I had to breathe. In an attempt to escape the stress of the evening, I crept out onto the balcony without saying anything. I was able to breathe again as the cool breeze touched my face.

Then I caught sight of him.

“Emily?”

My first love, Daniel, was there. His genuine grin and gentle eyes were nearly identical. Time seemed to have stopped.

“Daniel… I can’t believe it’s you.”

He took a step toward her. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

We struck up a conversation, and it came so naturally. It’s like putting on a beloved sweater again.

I was reminded of a simpler period when I was just Emily, not Lucas and Mia’s mother or Jack’s wife. I had dreams at that time, and no one else could define me. I felt… alive for the first time in years.

Daniel said, “You seem tired,” with concern. “Are you okay?”

I smiled feebly, unsure of how to respond. “Life… it’s just been a lot lately.”

“I understand. Perhaps we should get together once more to catch up. Sometimes talking is beneficial.”

“I’m married now, Daniel.”

Gently, “I know,” he said. “But I’m only offering a conversation.”

Daniel gave me a card before he went.

“I won’t be in town long, but if you ever need someone to talk to… don’t hesitate.”

I gazed intently at the card. I became aware of a difference in myself as he left. Something I hadn’t experienced in a while.

Perhaps hope?

However, I dismissed the thoughts with a shake of my head before the emotion could establish itself.

No, I’m not like this. I have a family and am married. I must concentrate on that.

I looked around and saw Jack. All I wanted to do was go home, put my arms around him, and act like nothing was wrong.

But Claire was already with him when I returned to the party. Jack didn’t appear to be aware or concerned.

“All set to go?” Trying to seem as regular as possible, I asked.

Jack shook his head, looked at his watch, and arched an eyebrow.

“I called you a taxi. You’re clearly ready to leave.”

“What?” Confused, I asked.

He shrugged casually and remarked, “I knew you’d want to rush home.” “You’re just like that. You don’t endure these things. Everything is alright. It’s crucial, therefore I’ll stay.”

“Why is she with you all the time, Jack?” My eyes darted to Claire, who was suddenly acting as though she wasn’t listening, and I blurted.

He shook his head and laughed.

“Emily, don’t start. Don’t turn this around on me. You’re the one running off, not me.”

This was always the case. I was always at fault, regardless of what I said or how I felt.

“Fine,” I said in a whisper.

Shortly after, the cab pulled up, and I got in, feeling even more isolated than before.

When I reflexively reached out when I woke up the following morning, Jack’s side of the bed was cold and empty. He had not returned home. My phone buzzed on the nightstand as I sat up, my heart sinking.

Jack sent the following text:

“Stayed at a friend’s. Late night talking.”

I gazed at the text. There was no genuine explanation, no warmth. Words that seemed like a flimsy justification. Despite my desire to believe him, I was unable to do so. I had a gut feeling that I knew the truth.

I made breakfast downstairs while attempting to maintain normalcy. But now nothing seemed regular.Mia took her phone from the counter and strolled into the kitchen, hardly glancing at me.

“I’m staying at Olivia’s tonight after the party.”

I placed the plates on the table and said, “No, Mia.” “You’re spending tonight at home.”

She slapped her phone down on the counter as her eyes flared with rage.

“Dad already said I could go!”

I’m telling you that you can’t. Mia, you’re fourteen. You cannot simply do as you please.

Mia shoved her dish out of her path.

“You always make things more difficult! Dad gives me the freedom to do as I like, but you…”

Her face flushed with annoyance, she rose to her feet.

“It makes sense why he no longer loves you! Everything is constantly ruined by you!”

Her remarks really got to me. She stormed out of the room before I could respond. After sitting silently at the table, Lucas eventually raised his voice.

“Mia’s right, you know.”

“What?”

“It’s evident,” he added. “Dad is having an affair. It is due to you.”

Unable to understand what I was hearing, I blink.

“What do you mean?”

Lucas gave me a disappointed look and shrugged.

“You’ve let yourself go. You’re always nagging him, always making things hard. No wonder he’s found someone else who understands him.”

As his words took hold, my chest constricted. My own kids thought I was the issue. Just as I had lost Jack, I had lost them.

Daniel’s business card was still on the kitchen counter when I approached it.

I called Daniel later in the afternoon. Someone has to listen to me.

I was instantly relieved when we first met, as if a burden had been lifted off my chest. I let myself talk honestly for the first time in years.

I started, “I’m not even sure where to begin.”

“Jack… it’s like he’s been slipping away for years. At first, I thought it was me, that I wasn’t doing enough. But no matter how hard I tried, nothing changed.”

Daniel was seated next to me, listening intently, occasionally nodding, but never interjecting.

“I gave up so much,” I added, speaking more quickly now. “My happiness, my dreams.” For him, I let myself vanish. And now… I feel like I’m not important. Simply empty and lost.

“Emily, it sounds like you’ve been carrying a lot for a long time.”

“Yes, I have.”

“You’re worthy of better,” he remarked quietly. “You truly do.”

I had persuaded myself for years that this was typical and that my happiness was unimportant. But after listening to someone else say it as Daniel and I were sitting there, I wasn’t so sure.

I noticed something in the distance as we kept walking. A beat skipped in my chest. Jack was the one. Claire was with him. And they shared a kiss!

Oh my god! Is that a nightmare?

“What is it?” Daniel followed my eyes and inquired.

“That’s Jack… and Claire.”

As we saw them kiss, Daniel and I remained motionless. Jack failed to see me.

At that moment, something changed inside of me. Something definitive. I no longer felt anything for him.

Daniel gripped my hand with tenderness.

“It’s not my place to say, Emily. But, maybe, the kids need some time without you around to realize what they’re missing. Sometimes it takes distance for people to understand.”

Unsure of what to say, I looked up at him, but he wasn’t done yet.

Tomorrow, I’m taking a plane to Florida. There is plenty of room for my house. I invite you to accompany me. I won’t put any pressure on you, and I’m not asking for anything. It will allow you to consider things through and clear your thoughts before making a decision.

It was alluring to consider leaving, to escape the burden of my life. However, I was afraid of making a mistake and of what would occur if I left.

Daniel went on, “I’ll send you the ticket tonight.”