Heartbreak, in one way or the other, happens to every single human being in the world at least once in their life. Romantic heartbreaks especially happen more often than others because firstly, falling in love with another person is a very common human tendency, and secondly, when two different individuals come together in a relationship, it is always difficult to reach a middle ground. Giving up then too is a human thing to do.
There are ways to cope with every heartbreak in this world. Life is short and it is unfair to yourself to be stuck in reverse.
Heartbreaks are life-changing and life lessons in themselves. You must find the strength in yourself to outgrown these experiences no matter how painful they sound and no matter how painful they are. Once you do, you will come out stronger and better.
One of the biggest mistakes you can commit in this case is:
Attaching too much weight in your partner’s opinion of you.
Of course their opinion matters, and of course you should always look towards self-improvement. But it is also important to listen to yourself, your own opinion about yourself and what kind of a person you believe yourself to be.
Reflect on the mistakes that you might have made in the relationship; just because you failed, that doesn’t mean you are a failure. If anything, it proves what Green Lantern says: “I am only human”.
People make mistakes, realize that they did and they mend them. Mend yourself with or without them. Giving someone excessive autonomy over yourself can never be okay.
It is okay to feel bad and even break down in tears when someone makes you feel inadequate and not needed. It is a terribly debilitating feeling. But make sure it doesn’t get to you and that it doesn’t destroy you. Things might seem blurry and out of focus, thanks to the tears.
Concentrate on what you have left instead of crying over things you can’t change. Focus again.
Jerry Seinfeld, the world’s richest comedian and the creator of the show Seinfeld once said: “The three rules to success and happiness are: bust your ass (doing what you do), pay attention (at the task in hand), and fall in love (with your work).”
A man without a purpose in life, the great Netaji Subhash Chandra Bose wrote once, .. a ship without a rudder. It will invariably get lost at sea. Try not to be a ship like that. Have a purpose in life, find a vocation that suits you and make that your goal. Live a full life and you will find love again.
Take an active role when it comes to running your own life.
No one else should be responsible for yourself. The only people who can and should help are friends and family.
Reconnect with the ones you have lost contact with over the years.
Meet old friends, go out and have fun. Moping, sulking and keeping a sad face can never get you anywhere. Stay motivated and keep in mind that you matter; life is a gift and you should keep in mind that the gift is perishable. A very good thing to do to regain focus is volunteer work or working for a cause. Work for a cause that suits your ideals and bury yourself in it. There is nothing more enjoyable than being surrounded by friends, family and work. Work gives you a sense of autonomy over yourself. This is the easiest way of getting your life back on track.
Besides that, consider going back and trying out a childhood hobby, picking up a musical instrument you were passionate about once.
Take control of the reins of your life and love will happen to you again. Do not even worry.
Cheers and power to you.