Self-Improvement
6 Signs the Relationship with your Mother is Toxic–Here’s What You Can Do About It
Every relationship has different layers. Even mothers and children have a layered relationship. Parents generally give their everything for their children and they love them unconditionally. But sometimes the relationship with your parent might become toxic.
It is hard to comprehend that a mother can become toxic for someone but sometimes it does happen. And there are 6 signs that show that the relationship is toxic.
First and foremost, mothers are also humans and they were also children once. Maybe they have some unresolved issues that lead them to behave as they do, but that does not mean that they are bad people.
It is hard to realize that one may have a toxic relationship with their mother but there are people who do have these kind of relationships. This is a sensitive and complicated relationship and should always be handled with caution.
1. Ignores your emotions
Even if she is your mother, she might be ignoring your emotions and transferring her own demands and dreams onto you when you clearly do not want them. She does not consider your feelings and expects to plan your life according to her wishes. She throws her own dreams onto you without thinking about your desires. She always belittles your wishes and never pays attention to you.
2. She makes you responsible for everything in her life
She thinks that due to her toiling over you and bringing you up, every sadness and happiness revolves around you. She would think that, because she gave you a stable life, you are obligated to do whatever she wants and says without considering your own feelings. Your actions are what makes her sad or happy. Nothing is your own but everything revolves around her.
3. She has no respect for boundaries or privacy
She thinks because you are under her supervision she can always boss you around and never give you privacy or respect your boundaries. She gets offended if any decision is taken without her consent and always pressurises you to do whatever she says. She does not give you space and always disrespects your likes and dislikes. This can become toxic annd she might also never listen to what you need.
4. She envies you
Narcissistic mothers always feel jealous of your achievements and goals. They always want the spotlight on them and cannot bear anyone else being better than them. Narcissistic people always want everyone to admire them and forget that others are humans and always get obsessed with their needs only.
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5. Harsh words
They always insult you with harsh derogatory words and always demoralize you. They never boost your confidence and they blame you for everything. They take out someone else’s anger on you and you being their children cannot always retort so you take it to be true. They never think twice before insulting your choices and always say you’re imperfect. They never give you confidence and they don’t show affection often.
6. You often feel that you have to choose between you and her
Healthy mentally stable mothers always love respect and they nourish their child and are happy by their achievement. They love their children and respect them as individuals. Unhealthy mothers do not respect anyone for that matter and always make you feel guilty about your choices and makes you doubt yourself. You should not be demoralized because you are perfect the way you are. It is because of her own insecurity that she insults you. Never feel guilty.