Off The Record
My Daughter And Son-In-Law Banned Me From Seeing My Granddaughter—The Reason Left Me In Tears
I never thought my own kid would ever stop talking to me altogether. Understanding why it happened and who was actually in charge made the pain even worse.
I never thought I’d be writing something like this for random people to read online at the age of fifty-seven. However, I must get it off of my chest. My name is Linda, and I have dedicated the most of my life to my daughter, Chloe. Until she abruptly cut me off from her life. Let me tell you a little about my daughter.
The day Chloe was born, her father departed. “I’m not ready,” he whispered as he stood there in the hospital room, looking pale and terrified, and then he turned and left. Since he never returned, I had to handle everything by myself, focusing mostly on my daughter.
I put in long hours, worked two jobs, and had sleepless nights to keep us afloat. On occasion, I returned home after she had gone to sleep. I would then sit by her bedside and give her a gentle pat on the hair while muttering that I was sorry I wasn’t there more.
However, despite everything, I somehow made it to every doctor’s appointment and every knee scrape. I braided her hair before school, made sure she always had a packed lunch, and sewed her Halloween costumes by hand.
Because I cheered the most at every game and recital, some people would refer to me as a supermom. She also hated the sound of thunder, so I sat up with her during thunderstorms.
She was everything to me and the reason I lived.
I hoped things would finally become easier as she grew up. That perhaps, after years of being alone, I might still be able to see her create her own happy family.
I was overjoyed that she had discovered enduring love when she met her husband, Ryan. Soon after, there was more positive news.
“Mom, I’m pregnant!” she called me one spring afternoon, her voice beaming with happiness and tears. The cosmos seems to have given me another chance to perform better. I was gonna become a grandmother!
I poured all of my love and energy into getting ready for months.
Without considering the gender, I crocheted small sweaters in gentle yellows and other muted hues. In addition, I crocheted a blanket with Chloe’s eye color.
Every night after learning they were expecting a girl, I would sit on the couch and dream of cradling that tiny bundle of happiness. The lullabies I used to sing to Chloe came to mind as I sang them to her. It restored my sense of direction.
I spent the whole time with Chloe and Ryan when she went into labor. While holding her hand in those last minutes, I muttered, “You’re doing amazing, sweetheart.”
And after the nurses, I was the first to hold Ava when she was born. I felt I would never stop crying as her tiny fingers closed around mine. “Welcome to the world, darling baby,” I muttered as I rocked her tenderly. Grandma adores you.
I thought it was the best day of my life!
However, that was the last quiet time I spent with my family.
After Ryan and Chloe returned home from the hospital with Ava, everything was different.
I initially dismissed it as fatigue. I assumed it was simply a case of new parents being overburdened, exhausted, and hormonal.
Though I thought I was helpful, I gave them space and yet stopped by with clean baby clothing or casseroles.
However, once Chloe stopped returning my calls, my son-in-law (SIL) began to greet me at the door.
As he removed the baby garments from my grasp, he whispered, “You can leave that there,” hardly meeting my gaze. “Chloe’s resting.”
I would ask if I might enter for a brief visit with Ava. He would obstruct the entrance door with his body while shaking his head.
“It’s not a good time.”
Every time, I thought maybe next week will be better, so I left.
However, weeks stretched into over a month before Chloe finally took one of my calls one day. Her voice sounded so icy that I nearly missed it.
“I don’t want you around anymore, Mom. Please don’t come.”
I believed I had misheard her.
“What? What are you saying, Chloe? All I want is to see Ava.”
She cut you off with, “You won’t ever see her again,” “Ryan was correct. At the hospital, you made me feel ashamed. You couldn’t manage motherhood.”
“What? No, Chloe! That is untrue. I would never—”
“Just keep your distance from us. from her.”
My chest constricted. “I am unable to comprehend. Why are you treating me like this?”
She said, “You don’t have to, and you know why,” and hung up.
I stared at the phone for what seemed like hours while I stood in my kitchen. My chest was thumping with my heart. Everything from that day in the hospital kept coming back to me. What had I done? Did I say something incorrectly? Overtaken? Had I truly caused her to feel unworthy?
When I called again, Chloe didn’t pick up. Ryan greeted me with that same unreadable look on the porch when I arrived at their place.
The words “You need to leave, Linda,” he said. “You’re not welcome here. Don’t exacerbate this.”
He spoke in an overly composed tone, as if this were routine business. The man Chloe had once characterized as helpful and nice almost slipped my mind.
I was in a daze for the next few weeks. The baby blanket I crocheted for Ava was left folded nicely on the edge of my bed, unopened, and I spent the evenings gazing at it. My eyes were puffy because I sobbed so much.
I didn’t know what I had done.
Ryan was the only person who answered the door when I repeatedly attempted to visit their house. He spoke in a chilly, nearly practiced tone. “This is not a place for you. Chloe is not interested in seeing you. I instructed you to cease visiting.”
I repeatedly knocked and pleaded. I even tried calling Chloe’s phone, but it broke my heart to hear her voicemail. However, she never responded. And her face appeared to be made of stone when I briefly saw her, possibly through the window.
My daughter Chloe, who used to nestle up next to me on the couch and tell me everything, now regarded me as though I were her adversary. I was broken by it. Though I still tried to think of what I had done wrong, I… accepted it as punishment. I mean, what else could I do?
And then I’ll never forget what happened.
One afternoon, still enmeshed in that silent sadness, I was in the grocery store attempting to finish my shopping. I heard my name called as I turned down the cereal aisle.
“Linda?”
One of the nurses who had been in the delivery room when Ava was delivered, Claire, was there when I looked up.
She smiled at me as we hugged each other.
“You must be ecstatic! The world’s luckiest grandmother,” she declared. “How is Chloe doing? How is baby Ava doing?”
I felt sick to my stomach. My cheeks started to get heated. I felt embarrassed as I looked down.
I muttered, “I haven’t seen them,” as my eyes welled up. “Since the hospital.”
Claire’s grin dimmed. “What?”
“She refuses to answer my calls. Even without my granddaughter, Ryan and Chloe won’t let me near the house. Chloe claims that I made her feel ashamed. However, I’m not sure what I did.”
Claire’s eyes flashed and her grin dimmed. She glanced around as if to see whether anyone was listening. She then leaned closer.
“I’m not sure if I should say this, Linda. You should know, even if it’s none of my business.”
My heart began to race.
“What is it?”
After a moment of hesitation, Claire responded, “I went out into the hall immediately following the delivery.” Ryan was speaking on the phone. I heard him, but he didn’t see me. “Yes, Mom,” he said, although I didn’t comprehend at the moment. Do not be concerned. I’ll see to it that Chloe believes her mother is an issue. She will be turned against Linda by me. The infant will never be seen by her.
I felt as though someone had punched me in the chest as I froze.
“He called his mother?” I inquired. “She told him to do this?”
Claire gave a slow nod. It sounded as though everything had been planned. I apologize, Linda.
I didn’t even bid them farewell. I simply left my cart behind and left the store.
I had trouble sleeping that night. I gazed at the ceiling and reflected on everything—everything Ryan had said to me, every icy glance Chloe had given me. She hadn’t done any of it. Not at all.
I therefore composed a letter the following morning and put my everything into it.
I revealed what Claire had overheard and assured Chloe that I loved her more than anything. I pleaded with her to simply speak to me. I needed her to know the truth, but I also wanted her to talk to me. I told her that I would accept it if she didn’t want to believe me. Before dawn, I put it into their mailbox.
Three days passed while I waited. When I opened my front door on the fourth day, Chloe was waiting there with Ava in her arms.
Then she said, “Can we talk?”
We sat in my living room after she entered. On her chest, Ava was fast sleeping. We spoke for hours. When I repeated what Claire had said, Chloe started crying. She then revealed to me what Ryan had said I had done.
“He told me you tried to tell the nurses I was going to fail at giving birth,” she continued. “That you told the doctor I should be induced earlier because motherhood wasn’t really for me.”
“What?” I let out a gasp. “That is untrue! I never would.”
Chloe responded, “I know that now,” as tears streamed down her face. “I ought to have followed my instincts. However, he persisted in stating insignificant things, such as that you were attempting to manipulate me. that you would spoil Ava, make her naive, and confuse her. I don’t know why, but I trusted him. I was worn out. I was reluctant to acknowledge my husband’s deceit.”
I extended my arm to grasp her hand.
“You weren’t at fault. He tricked you. However, we can resolve this. We can still do it.”
Together, we made the decision to confront Ryan. In order to prevent him from gaslighting her once more, Chloe asked me to be present when she faced him.
When my SIL entered the room that evening and spotted us seated together, he froze.
His voice was oozing with faux calm as he inquired, “What’s going on?”
Chloe said, “Sit down,” in a forceful voice.
He didn’t. He stood with his arms folded and his coat still on.
“Claire overheard your phone call at the hospital,” remarked Chloe. “She told Mom everything.”
Ryan blinked. “What phone call?”
“You promised Margaret that you would make me believe that Mom was a problem. that she shouldn’t be close to Ava.”
He made an attempt to laugh, but it fell flat.
“Chloe, hurry up. It’s likely that the nurse misinterpreted.”
“Look me in the eye,” she commanded. “And assure me that you told the truth. Verify that you didn’t fabricate tales to malign my own mother.”
He remained silent for a while. Then he shrugged and sat down.
“It was for the best.”
Chloe gasped with surprise.
“For who?!” she exclaimed.
“For us,” answered Ryan. “For Ava. According to my mother, Linda would become involved. We had to nurture Ava properly since she would make her into a pampered brat. Yes, I did make sure you were skeptical of her.”
Chloe got to her feet.
“Get out.”
Startled, he raised his head.
“What?”
She remarked, “You heard me,” “Remain with your mother. In the morning, I’ll give a lawyer a call.”
“You can’t raise her on your own!”
“Yes,” replied Chloe, “I can.” And I will.
He went out. After Ava went upstairs to sleep, Chloe stayed with me the night and we spoke for hours.
Over the next few weeks, Chloe stopped communicating with Ryan’s mother. She stated, “If she tried to erase my mom, then she doesn’t deserve to be in Ava’s life either.”
Margaret moved in with Ryan. After missing too many days due to self-pity, he lost his job within months. Additionally, he ceased attending court-mandated visits. After bragging to everyone about her “perfect family,” Margaret now had nothing except a resentful son living with her and no way to see her granddaughter.
I started reassembling our relationship with Chloe.
She gradually reintegrated me into her life, though it wasn’t smooth or easy. I knew we would be alright and that we had something Margaret couldn’t touch when Chloe put Ava back in my arms and said, “I’m sorry, Mom,” in a whisper.
Because even though it could take some time for the truth to surface, once it does, it has the capacity to heal and fortify people.
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