Health
End-Of-Life Nurse Shares Surprising Gesture People Make When Near Death
There may be calm moments of awe mixed with intense melancholy when working in end-of-life care. A hospice nurse described a common yet enigmatic motion that many patients make in the final moments of their lives, which she has repeatedly seen in her work with the dying.
Maryland-based nurse practitioner and “death care coach” Katie Duncan has years of experience assisting individuals in finding dignity and serenity in their final moments. Having worked in long-term care facilities, home hospices, and intensive care units, she has noticed a pattern that she finds both profoundly poignant and perplexing.
In a recent TikTok video, Katie talked on what she refers to as one of the “mystical” aspects of dying: a lot of patients start reaching up, as though they’re attempting to touch something that’s not visible above them.
“In my experience, it’s very common,” she said in the video. “You’ll literally see someone reach up, like they’re trying to hold someone’s hand or touch something in the air.”
Sometimes, this gesture is accompanied by what are known as end-of-life visions. “People often say they’re seeing someone, a loved one, a pet, even an angel or a bright light,” Katie explained. “Other times, they don’t speak at all, but still reach up, as if sensing a presence.”
While there’s no scientific explanation for this phenomenon, many in palliative care consider it a peaceful part of the transition. Importantly, Katie noted, patients typically don’t appear to be in distress when it happens. “If anything, they seem comforted,” she said. “These visions, whatever their origin, often bring people a deep sense of calm.”
She added, “It’s one of the more mysterious aspects of death that we’re lucky enough to witness as caregivers. It’s humbling.”
Numerous commenters shared their own poignant memories after Katie’s video touched a chord on the internet.
“My dad reached up with both arms,” one person wrote. “Before that, he hadn’t been able to lift them at all.”
Another commented, “It’s the in-between. What a privilege to witness.”
Others echoed the sentiment: “It’s heaven they’re reaching for,” wrote one. “I didn’t want to disturb him, it felt sacred,” said another.
These actions provide many families and carers with the silent comfort that their loved one is at peace and being gently led by something or someone that is out of their line of sight.
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