Off The Record
A Boy At School Snapped Her Bra. What She Did Next Is Gold
An angry mom said mean things after her daughter got in trouble…
All names and places have been changed in this story, so it’s impossible to check the specifics. But I think it’s important, which is why I want to tell you this story. This is how everyone should stand up for their child! Good job.
I work as a nurse in A&E. We shouldn’t have our phones on us; they should stay in our lockers. At the hospital, a private number rings for me when someone calls.
“Hello, [Teacher] from [School].” There was an incident about [Daughter]. Please come in.
Me: “Is she hurt or sick?” Could it wait until the end of my shift in two hours?”
Phone: “[Daughter] hit another student.” We’ve been calling you for 45 minutes now. It’s really a big deal.”
When I get to school, I’m led to the head’s office. I see my daughter, her year head, a male teacher, the director, a boy with blood on his nose and face, and his parents.
Head: “Mrs. [Your Name], thank you SO much for finally joining us!”
“Yes, things do get busy in A&E,” I said. “I just finished giving over 40 stitches to a seven-year-old boy whose mother beat him with a metal ladle. After that, I had to deal with the cops about the situation. I’m sorry for the trouble.”
He tells me what happened after I’ve seen him try not to look embarrassed. My daughter hit the boy in the face twice after he grabbed her bra. At first, I thought they were mad at my daughter more than the boy.
Me: “Oh. Do you want to know if I’ll file charges against him for sexually assaulting my daughter and against the school for letting him do it?”
(When I say “s****l assault,” they all get tense and start talking at the same time.)
“I don’t think it was that bad,” the teacher said.
Head of the Year: “Let’s not get too upset.”
Head: “I believe you’re not getting the point.”
The mother of the boy then starts to cry. What did that happen? I ask my daughter.
“He kept poked my bra,” my daughter said. “He wouldn’t stop, so I told Mr. [Teacher]. He told me not to worry about it. The boy did it again and took off my bra, so I hit him. He stopped after that.”
(I look at the teacher.)
“Did you let him do that?” Why did you not stop him? Let me touch the front of your pants if you come over here.”
“What?” asked the teacher. “No!”
I asked, “Does that seem wrong to you?” Go put on Mrs. [Head Of Year]’s bra right now. Check out how much fun it is for her. Or on the mom of that boy. Mine or yours. You think it’s fun because they’re kids?”
“Mrs. [My Name],” it said on the head. “Please forgive me, but [Daughter] still hit another kid.”
Me: “No. She fought back when another student made a s****l attack on her. He’s almost 6 feet tall and 11 or 12 stone. She weighs 66 kg. He weighs twice as much and is a foot taller than she is. How many times ought she to have let him touch her? She was meant to be safe and helped by someone in the classroom. What should she have done if that person wasn’t there? He pulled on her bra so hard that it came off.
The boy’s dad looks both mad and ashamed, and his mom is still crying. The teacher isn’t looking at me. (I look at the top teacher.)
“I’m taking her home,” I said. “The boy seems to have learned his lesson. Also, I hope this doesn’t happen to any other girl at this school or to [Daughter] again. It’s crazy that you think he can do that to a 15-year-old girl when you wouldn’t let him do it to a staff member. I’m going to tell the leaders about this. I will have you arrested for s****l attack if you—” I look at the boy—”EVER touch my daughter again. Do you get it?”
I got my daughter’s things together and left because I was so mad. I told the Board of Governors about it; some of them I know from church (it’s a Catholic school), and they promised it would be taken very seriously.
I also told OFSTED (the government agency in charge of school tracking), who were just as shocked and said they would get in touch with the school. For that subject, my daughter was put in a different class, away from the teacher and the boy.
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